It's five o'clock! You've had a long day at work or school and it's time to relax. You can opt for a night out with the girls or meet that new recruit for drinks. But what if you can't? Are your girls doing the couples thing tonight and your rookie unavailable? What is your plan B if other plans fall through? Do you just decide to stay in? Consider this: call on that best friend, the one that knows you the best. The one that you can be most comfortable with in your own skin...YOU!
Hit the wine & spirits store and purchase your favorite bottle of wine. Choose your favorite movie or splurge and order a new release On Demand. Put on your favorite pair of sweats, curl up in a blanket and enjoy your own company. When the movie is over, you can give your nails a fresh coat of polish, touch up the eyebrows and play around with some new hair styles and make-up techniques. A night in, alone, could do you some good. But let's take it a step further by giving yourself the chance to add more people to your roster of "going out" options. It's easier to stay in when you're by yourself so be bold for once. Get dressed, as if you were going out with your girls or to meet that cutie. Strut out of the door, and head over to a place where you can mix and mingle. My personal pick, the bar at a restaurant. Sit your fine self at the bar (or in a place where you are visible to others) and order your favorite drink, the one that contains enough alcohol to give you that buzz of confidence you'll need. (Note: I stress the word buzz, which in no way means tipsy and definitely not drunk! Don't forget, you are alone and you must keep a level head so that you make it home safely.) Scope out the scene and the people around you. Any prospects?
I once read that a good way to hint that you're interested in someone is to stare at them. Yes, stare! If you were raised right, you're probably thinking this is one of the rudest things you could do, but trust me...it works! If you engage in some innocent eye contact, you'll give off the flirty aura that you are approachable, which should give him the confidence he needs to approach you. If you don't believe me, try walking down the street today and flashing a smile at a stranger as you pass. The stranger will either look at you like you're crazy or smile back. However, I promise that the latter is the more natural response.
Remember that no matter how cocky they may come across, ALL guys are afraid of rejection so you have to give them every reason to believe that when they do get up the nerve to come speak to you, they either won't get turned down, or they'll get turned down nicely. If you're out with a group of your girlfriends, it can be intimidating for a guy to approach you. He knows that there's a fifty percent chance that he'll get rejected, not only in front of you, but in front of all of your girls. When he notices you're seated alone, he'll be more likely to make his move. But if you're not quite ready to go at it alone, try limiting your party to just you and one other female friend (and make sure you send her to the bathroom to check her make up as much as possible, lol). A male friend, gay or straight, still sends off an unapproachable vibe.
But let's go back to your table for one. You don't HAVE to go out with the expectation of meeting someone. Being comforatble being alone shows great maturity and growth. How can anybody be content with you if you're not content with yourself? Take the alone time to appreciate and celebrate your single status. There'll come a day when you'll long for some "you time."
3 comments:
For Real.. By your GOTDAMN self. Ladies, you shouldnt call me more that twice a week. It comes off as desperate and frankly, I dont do desperate(alot). READ A BOOK!! Shoutout to Pookie mama dem, my cuzin quasha, and everybody in the 215. HOOOOLLLLEEEERRRRRR
I've noticed you always want "you time" when you can't make time for it, but when you have the time for "you time" you itch to be with someone. It's hard to deal with. A pet helps with that. But whatever you do, if you do stay home by yourself, DO NOT talk yourself into going to any store. I don't care if its a clothing store, shoe store, drug store, or even a grocery store. You'll end up walking out with a bunch of stuff you didn't need and in debt. Unconsciously people do these things to get through the alone time faster.
My favorite pass-time is not eating alone, Although I have long been comfortable with being "alone" I rather single or not-in-a-relationship. The word Alone shouldnt deal with being in a relationship or not. Being alone should only be a physical state, not a personal description. I dont like going out alone its cause I'm a talker and sitting alone just gives more more stuff to talk about later, so if somebody goes with me I don't have to relay what happened when I went out, because oddly enough something always happens. On the other hand there is the rare occasion I go out alone but that normally means I am mad and I dont want anyone in my space.
With the meeting people in smaller groups, my experience is: you can be with 2 or 12 girls as long as you look they will come. Hell sometimes if you look by accident they still come, but its true a sweet smile with your eyes for a second or two will get him across that room ACSP(ASAP)
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